Alice Cooper is a dirty liar.
Well, I’m back again and it’s time to do the whole balancing act in which I try to have a social life, succeed academically, and learn to control my knack for getting into uncomfortable situations.
We’ll see what happens.
And here’s some greeter stories for you!
And they’re all about my hair!!! #girlpost
Return of the Nerd
It was the dreaded day of move-in, solely dreaded due to its hectic nature.
Otherwise, it was fun “HOLY CRAP, I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU IN MONTHS!” time.
Reunited and it feels so goooood…
Anyways, I had seen a good deal of my friends, who then went off to unpack as I relaxed for a bit outside.
After a while, I noticed a small circle of people not far from where I sat. Among them was a friend of mine, who must have finished her unloading already. I thought my luck was good today, as when I saw her, she turned and looked back in my general direction. I waved, hoping to get her attention.
Little did I know, some other fellow was walking in the dead space between my friend and I.
He thought I was waving at him.
He waved back.
Things got awkward.
I glanced up at the lad as he walked in my direction, trying to figure out how best to work out the whole “Oh, I was saying hi to her, not you” situation.
And my jaw dropped a little as I noted Man-nerd staring back at me with a considerable amount of confusion.
Note: Man-nerd no longer lives in the residence hall with our gaggle of friends. Hence my shock upon seeing him.
And so we stared at one another. Once my “deer in the headlights” phase passed, I became rather offended. He was staring at me with the air of someone who has just encountered a slightly unattractive alien on their front porch. I mean, I hadn’t expected him to explode with joy if we did see each other again, but I thought a smile or obligatory head nod might be in order.
Suddenly Man-nerd’s face transformed into what I could only assume was the love-child of a gasp and a smile. Better than an alien-encounter face, but I still had no idea what was going on.
He promptly rushed over and I, relying on instinct more than my usual thought pattern, accepted a hug without incident.
“Your hair is so different!” he exclaimed, “You look like a different person! How are you, girl?”
I was still kind of taking in the shock of his arrival and it took me a second to get my bearings.
“Good,” I heard myself say, “I’ve been doing good.”
Well, that’s not grammatically correct at all, but…
Here was the part where I would pull away and ask “How was your summer?” like I had with everyone else. On a side note, I really don’t know why people still ask that (or perhaps just college students specifically) as the magic of the internet allows everyone to know exactly how everyone else is every second of the day. Must just be a lingering courtesy thing. Anyways, as I attempted to do so, I was met with that awkward situation one often faces in which one party is done hugging, while the other has not quite had their fill. I got out the courtesy question, but my step backwards out of the embrace was met with a protesting squeeze which would have caused me to choke on my gum. You know, if I partook in the practice of imitating a cow.
Otherwise the greeting went well, which is more than I can say for most things.
Let’s State the Obvious!
Sounds like a bad game show, doesn’t it?
To get right into it, just before entering one of my lectures, I discovered that the professor was one that I had already had last fall. I really liked him, so I was quite excited. I also wondered if he would remember me.
He called out my name on the roster, I replied, and he glanced down at his class list to move on to the next person.
Then he looked back up at me.
“You’ve changed your hair color since last year,” he said.
It was an odd thing to work out a reply to, so I determined that I would say, “Yes, it used to be brown.” Or, “Yeah. The black and the bangs are new.”
Both statements would have worked.
Instead, I combined the two into one very pointless statement.
“Yeah, I dyed it black and got bangs.”
As I was speaking, all I could think was, Why are you saying this?
He knows your hair is black.
He knows you have bangs.
He can see you.
He’s staring at you right now.
Oh my God, don’t say that.
Oh my God, shut up.
You sound so stupid!
OH MY GOD!
Now it’s too late.
It’s amazing the speed at which one can think, yet I could not for the life of me react and listen to myself.
Cheers to a new year.